In late 2014, as I was navigating through a stressful year of 'it is my third year in my Education degree and I don't want to do this anymore, so what do I do?', I found it uncomfortable to wear my satchel due to the bottom-left side of my neck. I took it as nothing major. I just thought that I had pulled a muscle or created some minor injury due to constantly wearing a heavy satchel. Little did I know that my love for books had opened up a nasty can of worms.
In late 2015, after transferring my credits to my Bachelor of Arts degree, I went to an ENT specialist to examine what was happening in my neck. After an ultrasound and a biopsy. Waiting for the biopsy results was frightening, because we all know the c-word linked to that. In fact, the biopsy itself was terrifying. Luckily, I had had the area numbed. As the biopsy needle went in and the doctor furiously pumped at my neck, all I could think about was how terrible it was having a sweaty man's armpit in my face. It was discovered that I had an enlarged lymph node. I was told that if it were to grow and give me any more discomfort, I would have to have it removed. I was relieved. He gave me a follow-up ultrasound request to do in August 2016, to monitor it.
I still thought nothing of my enlarged lymph node. I stopped wearing satchels, and bought a backpack. I thought that would end my problem, until I was unable to sleep on my left side properly. Swallowing, breathing, laying down, I felt it. It was annoying. It was 2016, and I had just started to tackle my Bachelor of Arts Honours year. I was super stressed. My insomnia was on overdrive, and my sleeping pattern was a mess. I would stay up until 5am to read and write, and sleep about 6am, only to wake at around 2pm the following day. I grew irritable. I would yell at my family members for next to no reason. I started to develop endema due to sitting most of the time, and gained so much weight from mindlessly and stressfully eating. On top of that, my sister has an immune disorder, so I spent most of my mornings rushing her to hospital, and read most of my research papers in the hospital waiting room. It was difficult being the family rock. But I had done it well for so long, I never thought it would contribute to my downfall.
The lymph node grew some more. I found it hard to breathe some nights and days, and I had asked my mother and sister to monitor me as I showered, for I felt as though I was going to pass out. I stopped wearing shirts, and chose instead to wear thin singlets and shorts. This was highly unlike me, for if you get me anywhere near a fridge or air conditioner, even in the summer, my body would respond with an endless stream of the 'number 2'. But I was different. I was overheated, overanxious, and over it. I attributed all of this to stress, and thought to leave my ultrasound to after October, after submitting my thesis.
Gaining weight, saying things that made Jesus put me on mute while I drove and being as hot as the Sahara Desert were all too much for me to handle, and finally, after letting my thesis go into the assessor's hands in late October, I decided to follow up on my medical journey.
I had the ultrasound done. Being on my back is a tough thing for me, considering I was hit by three cars when I was three years old, and have sustained a traumatic injury to my back and right side of my body. I notified the doctor performing the ultrasound of this. "We won't be too long."
But we were. Instead of focussing on the left side of my neck, he started to move towards the middle. As he pressed, I couldn't breathe. "Any longer?" "No, no, almost done." But he wasn't. I was so uncomfortable. I didn't think to tell him to focus more on the left side, and I didn't think of what it meant that he wasn't.
After it was done, he looked up at me and smiled. "Haven't I done scans for you when you were younger?" I recognised him. He had. "Ah. I thought so." He smiled again and left the room. I found that strange.
A follow-up appointment did not have to be made for my ENT specialist. Instead, he called me. "The lymph node has grown. It's nothing to be concerned about, and I'm going to send you to my friend who is a thyroid specialist to make sure that your thyroid is okay."
Thyroid? I mean, yes, I have been overweight for most of my life. But I have always had blood tests to check on my thyroid? It has been ruled out from months ago? I even had a blood test done in May 2016 to double check? Where was all this coming from?
I went onto google and typed my symptoms in. My mum assured me that I have nothing to worry about. "There's some sort of infection your body is trying to fight! Maybe you need a root canal?"
But after multiple searches, I stumbled upon an American site that read: Thyroid Cancer.
I closed the browser, and went to bed.
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